I'm in my third week at Twin Oaks. I have been working a lot here, and haven't had much time to write. The work quota is 42 here. It was 35 at East Wind. I am realizing how much time I spent relaxing at East Wind, and here I have to schedule time for myself.
I haven't had much time to socialize other than during work, but working with other people seems to be a good way to get to know them. I went to a couple parties, but didn't feel very fulfilled by them. I seem to end up sitting with a large group of people listening to them talk to each other. I tend to be quiet in large groups, because I feel like if I'm not quiet then I am competing for attention. I think I will spend less time at parties, and more time socializing with one or two people at a time.
I am still adjusting to the scheduled work, but I am getting better at it. Sometimes I get anxiety about being late to a shift, or feel too tired to work, but know that I have already made the obligation. I have been getting through it though, and I have been communicating to others about my tendency to have low energy. I didn't notice it much at East Wind, because if I was tired, then I would just rest, but I can't always do that here. Because of that, I have been thinking lately about what the causes of my low energy might be.( I get plenty of sleep.) Anyway, I have been looking into it.
Most of my work has been gardening, and seeds. I continue to learn more and more about gardening, and I am excited to learn about saving seeds. I learned the whole process for tomatoes today. I have also been teaching myself and harvesting wild herbs. I am getting into the herb garden slowly. I plan to start my own little herb bed.
I am working on adjusting, making friends, learning, and taking care of myself. I know that in time, it will all be well, and this will feel like home soon. I really miss my friends at East Wind, but I am glad I am here right now.