Saturday, July 30, 2011

Twin Oaks

I'm in my third week at Twin Oaks. I have been working a lot here, and haven't had much time to write. The work quota is 42 here. It was 35 at East Wind. I am realizing how much time I spent relaxing at East Wind, and here I have to schedule time for myself.

I haven't had much time to socialize other than during work, but working with other people seems to be a good way to get to know them. I went to a couple parties, but didn't feel very fulfilled by them. I seem to end up sitting with a large group of people listening to them talk to each other. I tend to be quiet in large groups, because I feel like if I'm not quiet then I am competing for attention. I think I will spend less time at parties, and more time socializing with one or two people at a time.

I am still adjusting to the scheduled work, but I am getting better at it. Sometimes I get anxiety about being late to a shift, or feel too tired to work, but know that I have already made the obligation. I have been getting through it though, and I have been communicating to others about my tendency to have low energy. I didn't notice it much at East Wind, because if I was tired, then I would just rest, but I can't always do that here. Because of that, I have been thinking lately about what the causes of my low energy might be.( I get plenty of sleep.) Anyway, I have been looking into it.

Most of my work has been gardening, and seeds. I continue to learn more and more about gardening, and I am excited to learn about saving seeds. I learned the whole process for tomatoes today. I have also been teaching myself and harvesting wild herbs. I am getting into the herb garden slowly. I plan to start my own little herb bed.

I am working on adjusting, making friends, learning, and taking care of myself. I know that in time, it will all be well, and this will feel like home soon. I really miss my friends at East Wind, but I am glad I am here right now.

Thursday, July 7, 2011

moving on

Joshua and I left East Wind yesterday. We had been planning to go back to Twin Oaks for while. East Wind felt, and still feels like home. There is a big part of me that knows that if I stayed I would be wanting to know what other communities were like, and wondering if there is someplace out there that fits me better. I think that I became a stronger and more assertive person at East Wind, but my sensitivities were not as recognized and respected as they have been at other places.

Sometimes I find myself yearning for a home that doesn't seem to exist. I hope someday I can make my home wherever I am.

We are at Joshua's parents' house for a couple days, and then we will be taking a bus to Twin Oaks. Our friend Noah, who was visiting East Wind, came along with us, and the three of us have been laying down wood chips on the trail in their woods all morning. I'm tired! I made cheesy mushroom and kale sandwiches for Joshua and I, and now I feel like taking a nap...

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Feral Dogs

There have been three sightings this week of a pack of feral dogs on the East Wind land, and they keep getting closer to the community.

The first time, someone was going for a walk, and the dogs barked, growled, and chased him.

The second time was a similar experience for a different person.

Last night, another person was walking to the goat barn to do goat chores, and there was a large, feral dog sitting outside the goat fence, growling. She ran up into the community and got more people to come down to shoot the dog(s), but the dogs were nowhere to be found.

It has been decided upon by the community that the dogs will be shot. It is sad, but the dogs are vicious, and a big threat to the livestock and small children.

I have been pretty scared myself, actually. I have been "house sitting" in a personal shelter for a couple who are currently off the farm. The personal shelter is right down the road from the goat barn, in the woods. Last night when I was walking to bed, winding up my flashlight, I kept looking around, and listening for any noises. I was freaking out a little bit, because I don't know if I could defend myself from a pack of feral dogs!

Of course, I survived. I think, maybe, I was overreacting a little.

It has been interesting to see what happens when so many people dump off their unwanted pets in the woods. They become undomesticated, and if there are enough of them, then they group together and become very vicious.

This is not true for all breeds of dogs. Though, I am curious why some dogs become this way and others don't. I think many domesticated animals would starve, or get eaten by predators, in the wild.